There were movies in 2016. I saw some.

Movies and Television

Of the hundreds of movies released in 2016, I saw some.

Yay! Worth Actual Money

If I had stock, I’d have stock in Disney and Marvel. Because DAMN.

The blockbusters have it, with Marvel’s Deadpool and Captain America: Civil Wars kicking ass and Dr. Strange even worth the 3D upcharge. Sequels and spin-offs also take the prize, Star Trek Beyond and Rogue One (nee Star Wars) I’d totally see again.

I really liked Moana; Finding Dory had its moments, as did The Jungle Book. If you’re taking your parents to the movies, Sully is your safe bet; maybe Hacksaw Ridge for a ‘happy’ war movie.

Wish there was more there there (and that I didn’t out think it so early), still I enjoyed Arrival.

Meh. Discount Day.

I laughed at the Ghostbusters reboot, though think it could have been much better. Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, catching it again on cable it is still so.. whatever.

Good. Evil. Doesn’t Matter. X-Men: No Consequences.

Can’t type that I hated Benghazi or Deepwater Horizon, but could have waited for cable. The Magnificent Seven didn’t add much to the genre.

So many sequels that coulda, shoulda stopped when they weren’t behind. London Has Fallen, that last Divergent, X-Men: Apocalypse, The Hunstman: Winter’s War were all wastes of time and talent. Jason Bourne had potential but they went with daddy issues instead.

Don’t judge me, I sorta laughed at Keanu, The Nice Guys and even Central Intelligence. Because I’m sick of cancer and life and needed a zero IQ points required movie, I saw Dave and Mike Need Wedding Dates.

Ugh. How does this crap get made?

Marketed as a quirky buddy comedy. It wasn’t.

It took decades to make this dumb ass sequel?! Independence Day: Resurgence was bad AF. Don’t know why one bothered to make another cliched Tarzan.

It’s borderline but War Dogs – in part because of shitty marketing with a misleading trailer – missed the cut. Blaming Inferno on the (didn’t read it) source material, because that was boringly predictable.

Another totally off trailer, Passengers was an awful, horrible reinforcement of so many issues wrong with our culture and I’m gonna stop here before I type a fucking book.

Still to see: Oscar bait

Lots of buzzy, over-hyped, critically acclaimed movies – ahem films – get dumped at the end of the year.

I’ll get around to a few eventually, though caveat snarketor. I got conned into seeing that self-congratulatory circle jerk Birdman shit. If I wanted fourth wall meta wanking, I’d rewatch Deadpool again.

I also watched TV last year; guess I’ll type that too. Later.

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